Are you tired of hearing about insomnia yet? I am, too, so let's talk about something much more pleasant: cooking!
Wait.
Is cooking pleasant?
I'm not so sure—and if you agree, you'll love this ultra-low-effort recipe that doesn't require any cooking at all!
It starts with a block of tofu. Much like quinoa,
tofu is a protein-packed health food with absolutely no enjoyable
qualities whatsoever. While quinoa tends toward bland and grainy, tofu
tends toward bland and squishy. No matter how "extra-firm" the package
label claims, the substance inside provides nothing to sink one's teeth
into.
Sometimes
I buy tofu anyway, because I'd like to eat a little healthier. And then
it sits in the refrigerator, burning a hole through the shelf while I
try to come up with palatable ways to prepare it. This time around, I
came across a recipe for "methi tofu," which sounded interesting because
it was the only tofu recipe in pages upon pages of search results that
didn't scream "flavorless-but-spicy!!"
However, I took one look at the ingredients list and threw up my hands. This was a dish that was going to require cooking.
So much cooking! Suddenly, in the blazing heat of the July day that I
set out on this mission, I knew there was no way I was going to fire up a
stove and sauté anything!
So
I did what any lazy chef would do: I cut some of the tofu into cubes,
sprinkled it with some crushed methi leaves from my spice cabinet,
salted it, and put it in the fridge to "marinate."
In
case I were to find my artless methi tofu unappetizing, I took the
remainder of the tofu block, and mixed half of it with some bean stir fry sauce. Then I took the other half, added some Italian dressing mix and (because I was really getting creative now!) some diced green tomato, and left those to
marinate, too.
After
a day, I ate all three and found them...underwhelming? But really not
any worse than how they probably would have come out if I'd actually
cooked them. This is tofu we're talking about—even the most loving of
preparation methods leaves something to be desired in the eating.
When
I ate the leftovers the following day, I improved upon my work by tossing some thawed frozen
peas into the methi tofu. This added a little texture to the mix, and
raised the palatability from just-choke-it-down health meal to
almost-enjoyable cold entree! I think the key to making this recipe is not to think of it as a tofu dish, but rather as a tofu-based salad.
In case you'd like to experience this
culinary marvel for yourself, here's a recipe!
Cold Tofu Salad
Ingredients:
- 1 block extra-firm tofu (if you want it even firmer, you can press it first)
- 1 seasoning of your choice (some ideas: salad dressing, spice packets, stir-fry sauces)
- Salt, if the seasoning doesn't contain it
- Vegetables to complement your dish (Because this is a no-cook meal, I recommend frozen vegetables that you have thawed, or something like tomatoes or leafy greens, which don't need to be cooked).
Steps
- Cube the tofu.
- Mix all ingredients together.
- Refrigerate for 24 hours.
- Eat and enjoy!
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